How to Plan a Wedding Ceremony for Two Brides

Without an understanding of how to incorporate two brides into the language and structure, your special day may not reflect your relationship or vision.

I've been planning weddings since 2000, guiding queer couples to walk down the aisle by embracing their uniqueness and breaking the norms. In this article, you'll get expert tips on how to plan a wedding ceremony for two brides.

How to Plan a Wedding Ceremony for Two Brides

When planning a wedding with two brides, it is important to stay true to yourselves as a couple by booking LGBTQ-friendly, budget-conscious venues and vendors and skipping gendered elements. Wear attire that reflects your style, invite supportive guests, and personalize traditions and timelines to reflect your relationship story. 

Focus on incorporating symbolic rituals meaningful to you both, and work closely with the officiant to use inclusive script and language that honors your love and commitment as equals. Despite challenges, embrace this chance to create a deeply personal ceremony that authentically represents the start of your marriage on your terms.

Stay True to Your Genuine Selves as a Couple

I've seen countless beautiful ceremonies that showcase the love and commitment between brides by incorporating their personal stories and values. One way I've helped brides achieve this is by choosing traditions and customs that resonate with both of you.

Don't feel pressured to follow the conventional blueprint of a wedding. This is your day, and it should reflect your journey together. Here are some ideas:

• Personalize your vows and write them from the heart
• Choose a meaningful location for your ceremony
• Incorporate symbolic elements or rituals that hold significance for you

Establish Your Wedding Budget

During planning, among the first things I discuss with clients are their priorities and financial limits. This way, I can guide couples in creating a memorable wedding without breaking the bank.

Once you have a clear understanding of your wedding budget, it's time to allocate funds to different aspects of the wedding, such as the venue, catering, and attire.

Book LGBT-Friendly Venues and Vendors

When planning a wedding ceremony for two brides, check if your chosen venues welcomes same sex couples, and vendors are supportive and inclusive. By doing so, you're creating a welcoming atmosphere for you, your partner, and your guests.

• Wedding and reception venue: Pay attention to a venue's inclusivity policies and note any testimonials from other same-sex couples.
• Wedding planner: Hire an LGBT-friendly wedding planner who specializes in queer weddings to make your planning process smoother and more enjoyable.
• Officiant: Choose an officiant who is well-versed in LGBTQ+ weddings and respects your values and beliefs.
• Photographer: The photographer should make you feel comfortable and respected during an intimate event.

Ditch the Gender-Expected Roles

I prefer to challenge traditional gender-expected roles as I plan a wedding ceremony for two brides. Instead of sticking to the conventional bridesmaid and groomsman titles, I create an inclusive environment for everyone involved. One way to do this is to use gender-inclusive titles for the wedding party participants.

• Replace bridesmaid and groomsmen titles with "attendants" or "wedding party" members.
• Consider using "nearlyweds" to refer to the bride and groom-to-be inclusively.

I believe in creating a space where everyone feels comfortable and free to express themselves. This approach allows for diverse participation in your special day and ensures everyone at your wedding party feels respected and valued.

Wear What You Want

When planning an LGBTQIA+ wedding, remember that you both should wear what makes you feel most comfortable and beautiful. There are no strict rules or norms to follow. Whether you both want to wear gowns, dresses, or suits, the choice is entirely up to you.

Invite the Right People

I know how crucial it is to surround yourself with the right people on your special day. With two brides, you should consider a guest list that feels inclusive and supportive, creating a joyful atmosphere. 

Building a supportive community around you will only make your day that much more special. Think about inviting:

• Family members
• Friends
• Work colleagues
• Friends from the LGBT community

Balance Traditions and Personalized Timelines

Consider the balance between traditional elements and personal preferences. Here's how I usually customize the timeline and incorporate unique touches to celebrate a queer couple's love and identity.

• Include readings from LGBTQIA+ literature or poetry
• Select harmonious colors and patterns for attire and decor
• Incorporate meaningful symbols in invitations and other printed materials
• Choose decor and florals that represent the spirit of your relationship

Check Legal Matters

Same-sex marriage is recognized in many jurisdictions, although it's essential to research your local requirements. Wedding planning may take a long time because you need to check local and destination marriage laws and obtain the necessary permits and licenses.

Related Questions

How Do Two Brides Walk Down the Aisle?

Two brides can walk down the aisle together, enter from opposite sides and meet in the middle, be escorted individually by parents or children, or have one bride enter first, followed by the other bride. The choice should reflect your personalities, priorities, and visions as a couple.

How to Create a Wedding Ceremony Script for Two Brides?

Creating a wedding script for two brides involves finding inclusive language and incorporating cultural or religious traditions meaningful to the couple.  Personalizing vows and rituals using your stories, experiences, and even favorite songs.

How to Address Two Brides at a Wedding?

Two brides can be addressed in a wedding ceremony by both or either of their first and last names or by a hyphenated last name if taking one. This should depend on your preferences and relationship dynamics, as some may prefer "partner" and "partner" or titles like "bride" and "bride".

Conclusion

By educating yourself and your vendors, finding inclusive language, and personalizing traditional rituals, you can create a meaningful wedding ceremony as a same-sex couple. Lean on your shared values, story, and vision as two brides when making choices. Top wedding planners from Thomas Bui Lifestyle can help make this special day come to life effortlessly.